'I thought my abusive relationships were normal'

A survivor of domestic abuse has told how she found herself warning friends they were being abused by their partners despite being in denial about her own relationship.

Jemma Stewart said she found herself in a string of destructive partnerships before counselling finally helped her learn to spot the signs.

Speaking at the launch of an initiative to encourage awareness of "red flags" in relationships, Ms Stewart said: "I had friends in abusive relationships and I was telling them I would never let anyone treat me that way."

Since her last ordeal finally ended, she has helped hundreds of other women on Merseyside escape toxic partners over the last four years.

"I've experienced domestic abuse throughout the whole of my life from being young," she told BBC North West Tonight.

"I got into a pattern where I didn't feel I deserved any better."

Ms Stewart said she felt "quite worthless" and had even experienced suicidal thoughts.

"I didn't recognise the signs at all. They can be so subtle," she said.

"They can seem so romantic. It's really difficult to understand them unless you educate yourself on the different types of abuse."

She told how, at one stage, she had also been a victim of financial abuse, having worked for an ex-partner.

"It was very difficult to leave because then I wouldn't have a job or money and I had two children," she said.

"I was put down all the time. I was told I would never survive without him and I'd be nothing without him. Everything I did was wrong."

She was helped to escape after having counselling, but went straight into another abusive relationship months later.

Police eventually urged her to use Clare's Law, which enables women to request details of their partner's past convictions, should they have concerns.

Ms Stewart said the support she received helped change her life and she went on to set up a community interest company called Phoenix Healing in 2021 after working as a volunteer for another support organisation.

"I'm not an expert but I have the passion to help other women. We have helped hundreds since we started," she said.

She said sometimes "they just needed someone to stand by their side" and helping them "made me so proud of myself".

"It's amazing I can turn something so negative into something positive," she said.

Ms Stewart was speaking as people on Merseyside were being encouraged to spot the signs of domestic abuse and report it to police in a new campaign.

The Taking Action campaign, launched by Merseyside Police and Police and Crime Commissioner, Emily Spurrell, works with the help and inspiration of survivors.

The initiative has been created in conjunction with victims who have been helped at the specialist free domestic abuse service The First Step, based in Knowsley and funded by the PCC.

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